Dad in the delivery room yes or no? Most men want to be present when their child is born. Here are some suggestions
Dad in the delivery room
Dad in the delivery room? Yes, more and more present. They accompany the mother to check-ups at the gynecologist, participate in the birth preparation course and, when the time comes, in most cases they do not want to miss their baby’s arrival in the world.
There is no doubt: the attitude of fathers towards pregnancy and childbirth has changed a lot in recent years and the fact that there are many who they decide to accompany the woman also to the delivery room.
How to prepare for childbirth
Most men have to slowly approach the news. In the true sense of the word: they try to feel their baby in the belly, they are proud and they are amazed when they feel kicking. At the same time, however, the thought of childbirth worries them.
Do not diminish the fears of men. Create a new intimacy as we face the great event of birth together. And then that the man is afraid for his woman and wonders how to help her during childbirth is a declaration of love.
Men can (indeed: must) ask the midwife personal questions even before giving birth. Birth videos that clearly show what future parents should expect can also be helpful. However, it is better not to watch these videos alone, but for example during childbirth preparation courses with midwives. So they can immediately ask any questions related to the fears that will surely come to their mind.
During childbirth: the role of the father
According to the surveys carried out during the birth preparation courses, almost no man is determined from the beginning to want to be present in the delivery room. And there are future mothers who wait until just before giving birth to know if their partner will accompany them.
Breathe a sigh of relief dad: the place for future fathers in the delivery room is near the head of their woman. Only the midwife and gynecologist see how the baby comes out. What can you do? Support your partner, hold her hand, give her strength.
The child was born
In some countries fathers can cut the umbilical cord (no fear, it does not hurt the child), a very symbolic gesture: the symbiosis of mother and child is severed, now the father is also part of it. Many men say closeness during the first few hours is an important building block for building a good relationship with the baby.
Dad in the delivery room and Covid
The experience of pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding are fundamental elements. The presence of the father or a person chosen by the woman for labor, delivery and postpartum and, if possible, during the hospital stay it should be guaranteed and regulated by the individual health facilities even in times of Covid-19, taking into account the organizational and logistical aspects imposed by the local evolution of the epidemic. Women and families should be informed about the access assistance practices of the father or chosen person adopted by the different birth centers.
Here are some suggestions to prepare and better enjoy childbirth from the point of view of fathers.
1. Before deciding, think (yourself) about it.
Sure, almost everyone does it now, but what works for others doesn’t necessarily work for you. Maybe you just don’t feel like it or, on the contrary, maybe it’s the mother who would prefer her father to wait outside.
What is important is that make a decision together as a couple on what to do, each explaining their reasons and emotions to the other.
You too can take the preparatory course
Or at least take the lessons that are usually also provided for fathers. You will feel a little more prepared about what happens during a natural labor and delivery and you will gather some ideas on how to help your partner.
However, know that even the best theoretical preparation for childbirth does not necessarily lead to feeling ready for the event. The men who approach it with a little humility are truly “ready to give birth”.
3. In view of the birth, prepare a bag for you too
Inside the bag: some light snacks, the phone (with charger) and, if you wish, a professional camera.
4. Know that things can be different
Yes, the birth could go differently than you imagined. For example, labor and delivery may be shorter or longer than you expected or an emergency cesarean may be required, in which case you will hardly be able to witness the birth of your child.
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5. Be ready to follow and comply with the requests of your partner.
There are many things you can do: keep her company in the early stages of labor, hold her hand and caress her, massage her back and shoulders, help her change position, comfort and encourage her, accompany her in relaxation techniques, support her choices (for example respect at the request or not of an epidural).
But remember that they must not be imposed on the woman, who will experience labor and …